Only on this blog would I start a “serious” post with a cat meme.
ANYWAY. This blog post is serious. I was inspired to say something because of Kelly’s post on Vampy Varnish about the same topic. It’s no secret I’m a Vampy Varnish fangirl, as I love her blog and Kelly inspires me in many ways. However, this particular topic is something I wanted to speak up on also because it hits very close to home for me, personally.
October is Depression Awareness Month.
I have been neglecting my blog lately, but have been silent about it. But I fully believe communication is the key to, um, life, so this is the perfect opportunity to step up and speak. I’ve personally felt the impact of clinical depression in a very strong and powerful way. Members of my family and friends of mine have all suffered with it, and I myself have struggled with clinical depression off and on for over a decade now. In the same way I have accepted that I have asthma and I have to do certain things (or not do as the case may be), I have accepted that depression is something that I probably will have to deal with at various times throughout my whole life. Neither of them affect my daily life, but they’re both just something I have to cope with, treat, and be aware of.
Like Kelly said in her post, depression isn’t about just being “sad”. Not every person who suffers with depression is sitting around in a dark bedroom calling a suicide hotline (but if you are, please call one). In fact for me it’s usually about balance. I find myself having crazy mood swings at times. And the worst part of it is I’m usually totally aware that my emotional response to situations is out of whack when it happens. I’ll cry over something stupid. Or get angry at something that normally wouldn’t bother me very much. And food doesn’t taste as good as it usually does. Or things I like don’t appeal to me. My confidence dives, my drive to do things I enjoy wanes, and I get really tired. Since my depression is closely linked to hormones, it cycles. I’m not sure if I’m lucky it’s not a constant thing, or if I’m f’ed over by mother nature by the ups and downs.
I wrote earlier “my depression”. Mental illness is a very personal thing. I wanted to speak up about it to encourage the rest of you not to feel judged if you deal with mental illness, and just as one more reminder that you are not alone.
As to the blog, I’ll be writing more sometime. I just haven’t really felt the same excitement I did for it lately. But I’ve been doing this since 2008. I’m not going anywhere. I just have to devote the energy I do have toward other priorities. My job is pretty demanding (though I’m really enjoying it), and of course there’s friends & family (and kitties)! But I miss you guys, so if anyone ever wants to say hey I’m on Twitter, Gtalk, Skype, AIM… all that good stuff. :) I’d love to hear from you.
xoxo
Alyson
Blogging mojo, like emotions, would go up and down. Thank you for sharing your feelings. Kitties are best for comfort :)
They really are!!! My cat Sienna is very intuitive and whenever possible she tries to comfort me if I’m crying. It’s so sweet.
Hi there! I am lovenailpolish from Addicted to OPI-yum. I only just found you through the Blogazons group, but I already admire you for your awesome blog and for posting this. I know it isn’t easy to talk about! But the more people do the better.
I think Sparkled Beauty is right, life is cyclical. Moods, mojo, finances economy etc. Things usually flip back around sooner or later.
I agree with you about vampy varnish, Kelly is great.
I plan to post about depression awareness this week because of her, and your post is also encouraging me. I want to write about ways to help a depressed person. I would love to know from you, or any and everyone what helps them too! We are not alone, that is for sure! Depression is very prevalent right now I think.
Serious cat is so funny !
I am sure you are going to kick a$$ on whatever you do in life, judging from how you made this killer blog!
Thanks so much for all your kind words. :) That is so sweet.
Honestly for me, the best thing when I’m feeling awful is just *understanding* that it’s not just a matter of “oh cheer up”. It goes much deeper than that. And snuggles from my bf & kitties help too. ;)
Welcome back, we missed you….